When we think of relationships, remember that we are in relationship with more than just the people in front of us. I saw more than a few of my friends (and me) express their discomfort with their relationship with the word 'no' this week. Communicating our preferences to others can be both exciting and scary. Exciting because we are finally being real and true to self, scary because of anxieties over how we will be perceived by the 'other'.
Ever had someone in an 'authority' position get angry when you expressed your truth? And because you cared about their opinion of you....Well there you have where the anxiety came from. Especially in child-parent relationships.
Invite the relationship with 'no' to grow and be aware of the opportunities to practice as they come into your experience. Remember you asked for the opportunities to practice and that the discomfort is arising due to fear programming, so that you can kiss it goodbye, layer by layer. Saying 'no' to controlling people was the most difficult for me until I realized that saying 'no' to them was saying 'yes' to so much more.
I'm with you on this. One of the people in my life that I had to learn to say 'no' to was not happy at all with this change in me. It took be a couple of years of practice with her because I'd allowed myself to defer to her wants and desires for over 40 years and she did not like the change in me. She was a great teacher. An antagonist. The antagonists in our lives are there to help us flex our muscles. In the body the antagonist muscles must relax for there to be strength in the primary movers. See them this way, they are helping you move forward.
Ever had someone in an 'authority' position get angry when you expressed your truth? And because you cared about their opinion of you....Well there you have where the anxiety came from. Especially in child-parent relationships.
Invite the relationship with 'no' to grow and be aware of the opportunities to practice as they come into your experience. Remember you asked for the opportunities to practice and that the discomfort is arising due to fear programming, so that you can kiss it goodbye, layer by layer. Saying 'no' to controlling people was the most difficult for me until I realized that saying 'no' to them was saying 'yes' to so much more.
I'm with you on this. One of the people in my life that I had to learn to say 'no' to was not happy at all with this change in me. It took be a couple of years of practice with her because I'd allowed myself to defer to her wants and desires for over 40 years and she did not like the change in me. She was a great teacher. An antagonist. The antagonists in our lives are there to help us flex our muscles. In the body the antagonist muscles must relax for there to be strength in the primary movers. See them this way, they are helping you move forward.
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